


two headed snake

by Eleanor_Lambb



Category: Gears of War (Video Games)
Genre: AU, Del and JD both die, Funerals, Grieving, Possible romance :)?, remembering the fallen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-01-23 07:23:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21316390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eleanor_Lambb/pseuds/Eleanor_Lambb
Summary: Chapter 1/2 (bc i cant edit it to say that for some reason)gears5 was a good game and did some wild shit..........excited to see how everything continues in gears6also i liked the idea of choosing neither guy. im biased bc i prefer del and saved him and i think that kait's friendship with him is a lot more interesting than kait's friendship with jd but then i was like.......shit what if i can just say fuck it, no boys?Blue Hand is also just a bastard version of Warthanks for reading eeee :)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1/2 (bc i cant edit it to say that for some reason)
> 
> gears5 was a good game and did some wild shit..........excited to see how everything continues in gears6
> 
> also i liked the idea of choosing neither guy. im biased bc i prefer del and saved him and i think that kait's friendship with him is a lot more interesting than kait's friendship with jd but then i was like.......shit what if i can just say fuck it, no boys?
> 
> Blue Hand is also just a bastard version of War
> 
> thanks for reading eeee :)

Queen Reyna's appendages are hard, but yield, flesh streamlined together into solid muscle. One tentacle tightens around her chest, threatening to crush her armor with her inside. Kait's hand digs into her lower back, pulling free her mother's knife. Queen Reyna dangles Del and JD by their necks at her sides, the two trying their hardest to dig their fingers under to create space to breathe, gasping and struggling, yet she is unperturbed by their movements.

"Make your choice," she hisses.

The knife flies through the air, aimed between the Queen's eyes. She flicks her head, and the blade bounces off the crystals on her left cheek. It flies off, into the broken surroundings, clattering and scraping along crushed stone, out of sight. Kait's heart sinks into the earth along with the knife.

Queen Reyna grimaces, showing rotting and blackened teeth.

"The choice has been made."

And, almost simultaneously, the sound of bones snapping fills the air.

  
\- o -

Kait traces her finger around the rim of her glass. She'd raided a liquor cabinet set in the room, the third bottle she's polished off so far. Baird was kind enough to let her stay in one of the spare rooms, her squad counterparts in adjoining suits. The Swarm had pulled back thanks to the death of the Kraken, whispers of Queen Reyna pulling most of her forces back. Stragglers were left behind, getting picked off, numbers dwindling. She swirls the amber colored whiskey, watching the moon and the light of dying fires in the distance. It's been three days, and she hasn't left the room. A knock at the door doesn't surprise her.

She doesn't answer, or respond in any way, still staring out the window, sitting in an upholstered chair, still in her armor. She's still covered in soot, blood, dirt and dust, ruining the fine furniture. It gives her the barest inkling of satisfaction.

The door opens, "Kait?" Marcus Fenix says.

She doesn't want to look at him, talk to him, talk to _anybody_. But Marcus seeked her out, and he deserved some bit of respect. It was all Kait could give him. She couldn't give him his son back.

"I can't sleep," She says. Half a truth. She can't sleep because she doesn't want to. Her heart still beats adrenaline through her body, climbs up through her muscles and makes her ears ring and her eyes pulse. She was pacing for two hours before, lingering on Queen Reyna, her twisted appearance, the joined sound of Del and JD's necks snapping echoing harshly through her. Restlessness ruins her. She hears him enter, close the door behind him. She rises from her seat, pours whiskey into another glass, "Thirsty?"

Marcus shakes his head, but Kait still approaches him and hands him the glass. He looks to her, to the glass, then takes it, swirls the liquid inside. He downs it, not a muscle of his face reacting to the taste.

She pours him another, downs her own drink, invites him to sit in a chair that's propped in the corner. Marcus sits slowly, showing his age with a pained grunt, and a sigh. He sips half his drink, then leans forward. What Kait didn't catch was the deck of cards in his other hand.

"I can't sleep either," he says, holding the pack up, "Feel like a game of cards?"

She drags a small coffee table between them, pulling her chair closer. The cards are weathered and old, well used and stained. _Definitely before my time_. She sets the whiskey down at her legs, filling her glass and Marcus' when either empties. The two play Blue Hand, not talking other than to recite the small chants of the game. They play eight games, till Kait's head swims and the adrenaline finally ebbs, and she pours the last of the whiskey into Marcus' glass.

Marcus is having trouble keeping his eyes open, but is straight as a board in the chair, "C...O...G...spells..."

"_COG_," Kait mutters, placing down her last card. An ace of crystal, which outranks the grunt Marcus folds down.

He breathes through his nose, "Six - three," he says. He downs his glass, the empty one coming back down with a light clink, "You've got me beat, Diaz."

Kait scoops up the cards towards her, collecting it in a pile, "I learned from the best," The best being Oscar, who showed her how to play, how to notice cheaters, and how to cheat, as she had the ace hidden in one sleeve. She feels his COG tags in her pack, heavy like stone weights.

Marcus must have noticed a fond tone in her voice, as he leans forward, claps a hand on her arm. Then he slips, and slumps forward on the table, passing out. Kait wants to laugh. The great Marcus Fenix, boozed up and slumped over a game of Blue Hand. _Hah_. But what should come out as a laugh comes out as a shudder, a prick of her eyes where tears threaten to flow. Marcus' hand dangles, and she accidentally bumps him with her knee. Her hand slips along the table surface as she tries to steady herself, and the mass of cards fall onto the floor.

She gripes, bends down to scoop them up. As she does, she notices a silver edge peek out from under a bit of his arm padding. She picks at it, and pulls out a card.

A grunt, with double heads.

  
\- o -

JD and Del are buried side by side. Kait doesn't have to ask why. The two were so close. Brothers. It seemed right for them to depart the same way they lived. Together. It's large and extravagant, thanks to Baird and the general respect many show the veterans of the Locust Wars. COG funerals were different from how they were with the Outsiders. For the Outsiders, you were buried, or wrapped in a sheet and led down a river, or whatever was available to your settlement for a proper burial.

The COG preferred cremations. Two urns - _Empty urns,_ Kait reminds herself - sat on top of two stone platforms, which were to be locked in tall and thin marble mausoleums.

Kait chose to wear her own armor, shined and washed. She rationalized it as Del and JD preferring to see her as a Gear, instead of looking out of place in a suit - or _worse_, a dress and heels. She can only imagine the two seeing her in a tight - fitted dress and black heels, stumbling her way through the New Ephyra Burial Ground. She chuckles to herself, then the light falls, and she fights tears. There's too many people, and is ashamed for it. Even at a funeral, she can't put her fucking guard down.

Swathes of people passed and threw flowers and words of mourning onto the framed photo of Del and JD that sat on a small table between the stone platforms. It was taken during their time at school, Kait was told. They couldn't be older than seventeen in the photos, bright - eyed and young. No idea of the storm that was coming.

She starts to sit in a front pew, only to be flagged down and pulled to the standing party on the sides of each urn by Cole. His eyes are red and bloodshot, grey hair looking greyer, Sam by his side. They're both dressed in crisp formal wear, dark navy and fitted.

"They'd want you up here," Cole says with a sniff. He has one meaty arm locked with Sam's.

"Those two, thick as thieves. Don't think I ever saw one without seeing the other," Sam says. She looks just the same, aged and miserable, but grinning as if she would collapse if she didn't, "Don't know why Anya never adopted Del. He might as well have been her own flesh and blood, he was around all the time."

For once in all the time Kait has known him, Cole is at a loss for words. He simply encourages her to stand at his right, between him and Sam. She surveys the scene, Baird is busy bossing two attendants around, rearranging the intricate flower arrangements, face more lined than usual. He's dressed in dark navy as well, matching Sam and Cole. Off to another raised platform, people approach a stoic, still Marcus, who simply looks in their direction, nods, shakes hands, accepts flowers and cards. Instead of the COG formal wear, he wears a black suit and tie, durag still on. It's not new, but definitely washed free of ash and blood.

The final burial bells ring, and the people take their seats. A sea of people, all here for JD and Del. Kait tries to pick out dark skin and a mohawk and red sunglasses and a fake leg, but doesn't find Fahz anywhere within the crowd. And given how much of a mountain the man is, it's hard to miss him.

The funeral party moves. On Del's side, Kait is moved there next to Cole. On JD's side, stands Marcus and Carmine and Sam. Peering over the pile of flowers, Kait focuses on Marcus. He stands stoic, as if he were a statue painted for the occasion. Her eyes travel down, to his folded hands.

He clutches JD's tags tight, leaving red imprints. Kait had tried to return Del and JD's tags to him the days before. He took JD's, then placed Del's back into her palm, folded her fingers over it. Kait immediately understood that he wasn't denying Del's tags, he was giving them to her. JD and Del were her friends, just as much as they were Marcus' sons.

A side pouch on her hip weighs her down, filled with Del and Oscar's tags. Her mother's necklace jingled along with them. She thought of throwing it over the side of the city wall, but the opposite side caused her to place it back in her pack. The Outsider knot of her mother, not the Locust symbol of her heritage. She already threw away her mother's knife. She didn't want to lose the last piece she had.

Her fingers tap against the side of her thighs, restless as she stands tall next to the veteran Gears around her. A bit of movement catches her eye, near Marcus and Sam and Carmine, and Fahz saunters up. He's dressed in his COG armor, the same as Kait, new red - tinted glasses on. He's polished and clean, and his mouth is creased into a deep frown, taking up a spot on Sam's left. While Kait wants to walk up to him and say _Where the fuck have you been?_ she stays still at Cole's side.

At the front end of the platform, there's a pedestal with a microphone. Baird approaches it, breathes in deep, taps the microphone. There's no sarcasm, no joking tone, no sneer or any emotion that echoed a Baird Kait was familiar with. The Baird that spoke was empty, and sad. He spoke about JD first, weaving a long - winded tale of his recklessness, his charisma. He pinches the bridge of his nose, speaks about Del's loyalty, his intelligence. Both pillars of light. Nobody ever had anything bad to say about Delmont Walker and JD Fenix, it seemed. _Then again, nobody wants to speak ill of the dead._

One after another, the veteran Gears come up to the podium, air their sorrows and condolences. Sam weaves a bright tale about catching JD and Del trying to use her old, rusty tattoo equipment to give themselves matching ink. Carmine talks about their bravery, their openness to others, what good friends they were to his now - deceased niece, Lizzie, and how he was honored to know such brave Gears in his life.

Fahz approaches the podium. He's stiff, everything about him glinting in the morning light. He taps the microphone, feedback crackling. He takes his glasses off, folds them in his hands. His grievances are deep and cutting, not even his brashness marring the dripping honesty he pours out of his own heart and soul. He talks about Del and JD as if they died at age 75 instead of age 25, old men who've lived a life of adventure and honor, and not young men who's lives were cut short because of war. He lets go of the microphone, marches back to his spot next to Sam.

Cole barely keeps it together, crying and sniffing through his short speech about watching the two boys grow up together. Baird calmly paces up to him, guides him back to his spot next to Kait.

Baird stops in front of Kait, leaning in to whisper.

"_Your turn._"

Kait's heart hammers in her chest, and she nods, looking at the crowd. If they all knew it was her bloodline _(Not my mother, she's not my mother,)_ that ripped these two men, one the son of _First Minister Stroud and Marcus Fenix_, from life, would they all be sitting quietly in their seats? Would their tears dry up if they knew Kait chose to take out Queen Reyna over severing her hold on either man? It made perfect sense at the time. She didn't know that that was the choice the Queen was asking her to make.

She approaches the podium, fixing the microphone so it's lower. Feedback crackles, and she stares into the weepy - eyed crowd. She swallows, takes a few deep breaths.

"I knew Del and JD for less than a year," she says, surveying the crowd. She can feel every pair of eyes at the funeral on her, and it makes her cheeks flush. She holds her fists together, tight, folds them against the podium, "They came to my village escaping a situation I didn't learn about until recently. They were weary, carrying only their weapons, few supplies, and the clothes on their backs. Most of my settlement wanted to cast them out, wanted to let them survive on their own out in the wilderness. But they convinced us that we needed their skills. They knew how DeeBees worked, how the COG maneuvered, and how we could avoid them. They were worth more alive and with us than starved or frozen to death in the elements."

"I didn't trust them. I thought the two of them were arrogant and annoying. They didn't know how to fish, how to scavenge for old tech, and they definitely didn't know what poison oak looked like, because they both set up their bedrolls in a bushel of them," that earned light, _light_ chuckles from the grieving party, "After a while, I saw through the shiny COG armor. The light stopped catching the tags around their throats. They were eager...happy, to help us. I didn't learn to trust the COG, I learned to trust them."

"And they trusted me. My entire family is dead. I'm the last of my bloodline. My uncle was a Gear. My father, a Gear. And even though I hated the COG, I think Del and JD saw me as a Gear too. They didn't see me as just an Outsider, they saw a...." she looks down at her hands, fighting the urge to pour her heart out to the funeral, "A friend. They accepted me into their lives," she turns her head a bit, looking at Baird and Cole, and then Marcus and Sam and Carmine and Fahz, "Their families," she looks back to the crowd, "Their sacrifice, all they've done for humanity, will never be forgotten." _And I'm going to make the Swarm fucking pay._

She steps back from the podium, Cole patting her on the arm. Baird flashes her a tight, sad grin. She looks over, Sam and Carmine nod in her direction. Throughout the processions, Marcus hadn't raised his head, but his icy blue eyes follow her, unreadable. He never approaches the podium.

Piano plays, and Baird moves Kait to one side of Del's urn, taking up the other. Behind, Cole and Marcus are on JD's urn. Baird picks up Del's empty urn (It kills Kait that there's no body to bury, both being claimed by the collapsing ground,) and places it on a small, flat panel of polished wood with two long handles on each side. Baird takes up one side, Kait copying him.

"Lift," he says, and Kait does. Together, they carry Del to a small marble alcove with a brass plate bearing his name, "Lift," Baird mutters. Kait does, and they both push Del's urn into the alcove.

"Bye Del," Kait says. She doesn't know what else to say.

"It was nice knowing you, Kid. I'll see you again someday," Baird says, words smooth and heartfelt. He smooths his hand over the nameplate, then slides it closed, sealing the urn inside.

Fahz comes up behind, "Always was on JD's coattails. One never got in trouble without the other close by. They were like two sides of the same coin," there's no joke in his voice, just solid sadness.

To their right, in front of a separate alcove, Marcus has his hand still on JD's nameplate. Kait kisses her fingertips, taps Del's nameplate, then goes over to Marcus. She stops a foot away.

"He should be buried with Anya," Sam says, "She always was a little hesitant to let him out of her sights."

Marcus clenches his fist around JD's COG tags, "He will be," he says, and then he pushes the plate into place, sealing his son away. He places his forehead to the plate, eyes closed. His mouth moves, Kait unable to discern his words. He lifts away, paces to Del's grave cabinet. He runs his fingers over the raised lettering.

"I'm sorry," Marcus says. He leans forward, rests his forehead on the plate, "I'm sorry."

Del didn't have any family, an orphan in the aftermath of the Locust War. Maybe not officially, but Del was treated like another son. He peels back, looks at Kait. There's a dead look in his eyes, all trace of light gone. He reaches out towards her, lays a heavy hand on her shoulder. Kait purses her lips, fights tears. She moves closer, hugs him. Without his armor, he's lost a clear two inches, and she almost dwarfs him in the hug. He reciprocates, if lightly.

"I'm sorry," she says.

Marcus doesn't say anything in return.

The funeral scatters, people saying their final goodbyes to their dear friends and comrades. All that was left were Fahz, Kait, Sam and Cole, Baird, Carmine, and Marcus. The veteran Gears are huddled close, speaking in low tones. Fahz and Kait are standing close, shoulder to shoulder.

"I don't think I've seen you go this long without talking," Kait says to him, eyes still on Marcus, who mutters a low and odd word here and there, but otherwise listens to his friends speak.

"Yeah, well, not much to poke at," Fahz says. He and Kait look at each other, and she frowns deeper at the dark circles under his eyes. He places his sunglasses back on, "Feel like a drink at the pub?"

\- o -

  
It's late afternoon, the pub having just opened the hour before. The veteran Gears departed back to Baird's estate while the two younger ones split off in search of a drink. They don't change out of their armor, wandering down the street.

"They have drinks back at Baird's," Kait says.

"I don't really think they want to see a coupla' kids get ruined in the middle of the afternoon," Fahz says, a few steps ahead of her as they weave through the New Ephyrian streets.

"Can't argue with that," Kait says with a shrug. She's fine with Fahz taking the lead, as the city still felt overwhelming and confusing to her, blurs of white and grey and blue that melded together.

Fahz leads them to a pub with a honey - colored outside and wooden trim. A sign above the doors reads _Tyrian Sunrise_. Inside is warm, with soft amber lighting and an all wood interior. There's few patrons, one sleepy bartender at the helm. Instead of sitting at the main bar, Fahz slides into a booth in the corner, Kait following. She slides into a seat across from him.

"Whaddya take, Diaz?"

"Whatever they've got."

Fahz cracks a grin for the first time, even if it's half a ghost of one, "I know just the thing," he stands up from the table, goes to the bar. He comes back a few moments later with a whiskey bottle and two glasses.

"Lucky us, owner's'on call," he has a genuine grin on his face now, "Didn't blink at giving us a whole bottle to ourselves. On the house."

Kait looks past Fahz, at the owner at the bar. She flashes Kait a grin and a wink, goes back to polishing glasses. Fahz sits down, pours two glasses. He raises one.

"For Del," he says.

"For JD," Kait says.

Their glasses clink together, and they down their drinks.

Five glasses later, the two are pleasantly drunk and, for what Kait thinks is the first time since she's met Fahz, enjoying each other's company. She glances at the wall clock. It's only four PM, gold light streaming through the windows of the _Tyrian Sunset_. They should be heading back to the estate soon. _But not just yet._

She pours two more drinks, "One more," she grumbles.

Fahz responds with a grunt, then grabs the glass, "One _fuckin'_ more. We're almost past pissed, I think."

"What's there past pissed?"

"Passed _out_," Fahz says. He inhales, downs the glass, slams it back down. Kait copies him, the whiskey running hot down her throat. She looks up, seeing Fahz staring in her direction, eyes mostly shielded by his sunglasses.

"If you try and kiss me I'll smash this bottle over your head," she says, folding her fingers over the neck of the empty whiskey bottle. Kait doesn't know if she's joking or not, but depending on what Fahz is about to do, she'll find out.

"_No_! No," Fahz scoffs, "_Not_ interested, Diaz."

He doesn't continue until Kait eases her fingers off the bottle neck. The moment passes, and they both settle back into a warm quiet. He looks to her again, "Can...do you have them?"

"Have what?" Kait leans against the table, low, cheek in hand.

"Del's tags? Marcus has JD's, I've seen 'em. Holds 'em like the world'll fall apart if he don't."

_Oh_. Kait digs through her side pouch, feels Del's tags.

"Can I see?"

She takes the tags out. They're slightly weathered, not as weathered as Oscar's, but still has their fair share of scratches and dirt. The tags of a Gear who's seen some action. They seem dull in the pub light. Fahz reaches his hand across the table. Reflexively, she pulls the tags close to her chest, and frowns at herself. Fahz was his friend, too. If not a friend, a comrade in arms. She cautiously presses the tags into his open palm. Fahz handles them like they're fragile glass, not hammered steel.

"Oh, Del," he says, voice quiet and low, "Always thought you'd die an old man," he thumbs over the tags, "Me and JD used to joke about dying young. Him, mostly, I'm gonna live forever, but Del? We were sure he'd retire and become a tomato farmer like half the veterans still milling about."

The moment is almost sobering. Kait pours her and Fahz another set of drinks, "He told me he wanted to be a teacher," she says.

"Blimey, I believe it. Always was good with kids. Bit soft for a Gear."

She scoffs, _"Soft - "_

"Fuck, you can't say he isn't. A fuckin' bleedin' heart, that guy is," he pauses, "Was. Both of 'em cared too much about people who didn't give a fuck about 'em, Del especially," he thumbs over the tags, eyebrows scrunching together, "Hold it," he swipes off more soot and holds one tag to the light, "Huh."

"What?" Kait stands a bit, trying to see what Fahz was inspecting on the tag. He brings the tag down, one meaty finger tracing a few scratches on one of the ends. She squints, seeing that they aren't random scratches like she originally thought, but purposeful markings, "What's that?"

Fahz's jaw clenches, "A date."

"For when?"

"Same day he and JD went AWOL," is what he says. What Kait hears is _The same day we opened fire on those protestors_, "You see the end it's carved on?"

Kait nods. Each notch of the cogwheel was represented by the eight guiding principles Gears abided by. Order, diligence, purity, labor, honor, loyalty, faith, and humility. Recited like they were a wheel, spinning clockwise.  
  
"He's carved it onto the end that stands for _loyalty_."

Her heart sinks. Fahz clenches his fist around the tags, then hands them back to her. She tucks them safely into her side pouch, and looks at the wall clock again, "It's getting late. I think we should head back to Baird's."

"Yeah? Yeah, alright," Fahz pushes himself up.

Kait drops a twenty on the table (Still not used to using paper money instead of a trade system,) and she and Fahz stumble out. The evening had turned slightly brisker, a soft wind sending goosebumps over her skin. Fahz bumps her shoulder, nearly knocking her off balance, and when she glares at him, he breaks into a cheesy grin. They both stumble along the road, shoulder - to - shoulder, making rude gestures and verbal jabs at each other.

  
\- o -

The next morning, Kait wants to kill Damon Baird for having the thinnest curtains in existence. Bright and hot sunlight streams through the thin white linens, and Kait pulls a pillow over her head. The COG settlements had booze that should just be labeled as river water compared to what the Outsiders cooked up, but that didn't stop a headache from pounding behind Kait's eyes.

When she and Fahz had arrived to the estate the evening before, everyone had already retired to their rooms. And although a drunk Fahz stumbles around like a dazed bull, nobody left their quarters to investigate the noise. _Probably for the best._

Kait lurched up from the soft, expensive bed like she was rising from the edge of death. First she raided the bathroom cabinets for aspirin, gulping down sink water. She showered, dressed, pulling on an oversized hoodie and jeans and her weathered beanie (Which she did _not_ enjoy having to leave behind because it was '_against regs.'_) She strapped on the little side pouch that held Del and Oscar's tags, and her mother's amulet, pocketing the bottle of aspirin, and checked the clock. 9 AM. _Pretty late for a Gear_, Kait thinks, but she decides regs can shove themselves where the sun doesn't shine, and leaves her room.

Across the hall is JD's room. A small blue ribbon is tied to the doorknob.

As Kait meanders her way through the sprawling halls of the estate, she notices two things. One, that it's eerily quiet, and two, that nobody else is around. She frowns, furrows her brow_. If there were more Swarm attacks, someone would've woken me up, right?_ She enters the large kitchen, seeing nobody, and no coffee mugs or plates that would've told Kait anyone was here.

"Mornin'" A voice comes from behind, causing Kait to jump. Her head swivels, seeing Sam standing in the kitchen doorway.

"Morning," Kait says, "Where is everybody?"

"Getting ready to take off. The boys and I agree that JD doesn't belong in the tombs here, so we're heading off for the Stroud estate to lay him to rest with his mum."

Kait stiffens, guilt seeping into her stomach. The Stroud - Fenix marital home, where their only son grew up, where, Kait thinks, they finally thought they could rest their war - stripped bones. It's been a while since she'd last seen the estate, crumbling and in shambles as Jinn dropped DeeBee droppod after Deebee droppod on it. Marcus alluded to fixing it up, but who knows what shape it was in now. It would've still been in one piece if they were more careful.

Sam smiles, "Don't look so glum, sweetheart. I was coming to get you."

Kait's eyes light up, "I'm coming with?"

Sam scoffs, "Of course you are! You think we'd leave you behind? You were a tight group, it's only right for you to lay the boys to rest."

"Who else?"

"Cole, Baird, Carmine, and me. Small party. No big crowds, don't worry. I could see you sweat up on that podium."

Kait nods, "And Fahz?"

"Can't bury two of his best mates without him, can we? Noticed you two went out last night. Had a good time?"

"Define _good_."

Rather than laugh, a softness fills Sam's eyes, "Mhm, I know that feeling. Don't get in the habit of drinking every time you lose a friend, Kait. It won't end well," Before Kait can defend herself, Sam straightens, "Go get dressed and pack, then meet us out back on the landing pad. I have a feeling we'll be out there for a few days."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha this was originally longer but i cut this chapter part 3 will come...whenever lol
> 
> also....i do not remember what the stroud estate looked like. for my own self satisfaction i have twisted the grounds the estate is on. lol
> 
> \- thanks for reading, more to come!!!!

When Kait finishes dressing herself in her armor and collecting some spare clothes, Baird and Sam are speaking out on the landing pad, a Raven roaring to go.

"Great, look who's up," Baird says, yelling over the spinning blades, "Ready to go?"

Kait shoulders her bag, "Whenever you are."

"Climb aboard, Kid," he says.

The Raven is packed full, Sam at the helm to pilot. Every Gear is dressed in their armor, duffles packed away under their seats. Cole occupies one side of the Raven with Carmine on his right. Carmine and Cole are chattering, small banter. Marcus is in a seat close to the door, staring at JD's tags in his hands. Fahz is off in a corner seat, lounging, light casting over his face, phasing over his sunglasses.

"How's the headache, Fahz?" Kait asks, plopping in the empty seat across from Marcus.

"J's'fine," he mumbles back.

"What, can't handle your liquor?"

He only grumbles in response, fidgeting in his seat.

Cole tosses him a water canteen, "Drink up," he says, "Can't be dehydrated out on the field, Baby."

"With there being a queen now, we don't know what we'll face out there," Carmine says.

Kait takes the bottle of aspirin out of her pocket, "Here," she says, tossing it.

Fahz catches it, shakes out a few pills, and downs them with a swig of water, "Thanks," he says, tossing her back the bottle.

Baird hops into the Raven, "Everyone strapped in?" There's a murmur, and he claps his hands together, "Great. We should be there before sundown," he joins Sam in the cockpit, strapping himself in.

The Raven lifts off the ground, and they're off to the West. Kait leans forward, elbows on her knees, "Does Jinn know what we're doing?"

"She does this time," Carmine says, "Sent out a message this morning. She's cold hearted, but she's not that heartless."

Remembering Jinn had tried to arrest her with the intention on reconnecting her to the Hive, Kait seriously doubts that. She probably only did it to not gain anymore of Marcus' ire than she already had. Kait looks at Marcus, who raises his head and tucks JD's COG tags into his pocket.

She grins tightly, "How's construction on the house been?"

"Getting there," he says, gruff and low, "Anya had the estate blueprints sent to New Ephyra as practice for the DeeBee construction efforts, so restoring it hasn't been an issue. It's just missing paint, the yard needs to be kept, and the greenhouses and the cottage next door needs to be rebuilt."

She nods, "What's the chances of Swarm activity out there?"

Baird chimes in over the Raven PA, "Most of the Nests are popping up to the North, South, and East. The Nests out in the West aren't active just yet, but we're keeping an eye out."

Kait leans back into her seat, staring out the window. New Ephyra passes quickly on the ground below, people just dots on white stone and marble and lush and well - kept greenery. It edges over the city walls, coming to the surrounding ruins. The large body of the Kraken, dead and burnt, is still being cut up and cleared by soldiers.

"Kait?"

She turns her head away, to Marcus, "Hm?"

"You got Del's tags, right?"

She nods, patting her side pouch, "Couldn't forget. Why?"

Marcus doesn't say, just leans back, closes his eyes. He looks like, for lack of a better term, complete shit. Kait can't blame him. People lose people, that's just a fact of life, but it's not natural for a parent to bury their child. And after the years of wallowing in his own pain, mourning his wife, JD's death? It was nothing but another knife to his chest to add to an already unbearable pain.

In the hours following, not much happens. Kait stares out the window, watching the ground and forests fly by. The elder Gears chatter, Fahz and Kait making witty and snappy comments here and there. Marcus doesn't say a word, not once the whole time, eyes staring at the floor, out the window, or at the tags he takes out from his pocket.

"We're almost there," Sam says on the overhead, "ETA twenty minutes."

Marcus doesn't raise his head, doesn't respond. He just keeps staring down.

More time passes. The twenty becomes ten, five, then they're descending. Kait glances out the window. The Stroud estate is as Marcus said - mostly finished, but missing the trimmings and the bells and whistles, unpainted, scaffoldings still dotted around, propped up against the body. Marcus still hasn't lifted his head. Kait purses her lips, debating it, then pats his knee, holding her hand there.

"Hey, Marcus."

That gets his attention, gets him looking up.

She gives him the softest grin she can muster, "We're here," She pats his knee again, then stands.

Carmine and Cole file out. Fahz passed out halfway through the journey, and was still sleeping in his seat, arms crossed, head back, mouth open and snoring like he'll die if he doesn't. Kait kicks him (nicely,) in the ankle. He jerks awake with a snort, sunglasses crooked.

"Up and attem, Chutani," She says, picking up her duffle and hopping out of the Raven.

The sky is overcast, not a single sun ray in sight, blocking what could be a lovely evening. Looks like rain. Fahz drops heavy onto the ground, stretching.

"Oof. Shitty day," He says.

Kait elbows him in the ribs.

"Ow!"

The Raven whirs to a stop. Sam and Baird file out.

"So," Baird says, clapping together his hands, "First things first, go inside and pick a room."

Kait looks past him, at the emerging Marcus Fenix. He has his duffle bag in his hand. He takes a long wistful look around.

"Coming with us, Marcus?" She asks, jerking a thumb to the estate behind.

"Give me a few minutes," He says, eyes fixed on the house. He sighs, "Shit, is that a bird's nest in the roofing?"

Fahz gives Kait a pat on the shoulder, "C'mon, Diaz, let's move it."

Inside is dusty, mostly from wood shavings. The walls are free of decorations, but the wallpaper is up, moldings set and painted. The wood floors are new and stained.

"Beautiful house. A shame what happened," Fahz says, "Nice to see its coming back together."

"You've been here before?"

"Yeah, back when I met JD. Invited me for one summer holiday, 'cuz he knew my parents were busy being on - call at a new hospital on Settlement Four. Marcus didn't know I was tagging along with JD and Del, but he didn't seem that bothered," He shrugs, "Barely saw him besides at meals. The two acted more like strangers than father and son."

A weight drops in Kait's chest, heavy like a rock. She looks down the long hallway, "Let's find a room and set up there."

They head up to the second floor. Without furniture and rugs to soak up the noise they make, each step feels much more heavy, much more loud. Kait was afraid she'd fall right through the brand new floors at times. There's enough rooms for the crew to double up, four in total. Two rooms on one side, one on the other, and another at the far end of the hallway. Fahz approaches the first room on the left, pointing inside the empty space.

"Used to be JD's room, here."

Kait peers inside. Nothing there now, just bare floors and walls.

Fahz points to the one on the right, "Mine," He points to the one next to JD's, "Del's," He points to the one at the end, the door in the house that was closed, "That's Marcus' room."

"He slept out in the groundskeeper's shed when we last came here," Kait says.

"Never said he slept in it, just that it was his," Fahz shoulders his duffle, "Which one?"

"You pick."

Fahz steps into Del's room. Kait can't tell if it was instinct to enter the one he was facing, or a deliberate pick. There's no furniture, the air stale. There's no light to flip on. Fahz drops his pack, looking around, pacing.

"Yeah. We rarely slept in our own rooms, always the three of us hunkering in one of the other's. Marcus basically gave us the run of the house while he toiled away in his gardens."

Kait drops her bag, approaching the window. Outside, the surrounding trees and bushes have grown out, edging onto the property, the lawn spattered with wildflowers and weeds. Everything was unkept and wild. It looked perfectly fine to Kait, but to the city slicks around her, it was a complete mess. In the distance, a few yards from the house, was the groundskeeper's shed.

Hollow footsteps fill the hall, and in pops in Sam and Cole.

"Hey kids," Sam says, "Settled in alright?"

"Yeah," Kait motions to the empty room, "Love the style. Very modern. Who's the decorator?"

Cole laughs, "They call it _Blank Chic._"

Sam crosses her arms, leaning against the doorway, "Hey, be nice, huh?"

Cole enters the room, patting Fahz on the back, "How's it feel to be back again, Chutani?"

Fahz shrugs, "Fine. Just, uh...." He sucks in air through his teeth, "Just fine."

Kait's eyes narrow. Discomfort was very blatant on Fahz, and he did a shit job at hiding it.

"Well, we're gonna get dinner started. We'd appreciate your help down in the kitchen."

"What about Marcus?" Kait asks.

Cole and Sam exchange a look. Sam clears her throat, "He's....busy."

"That definitely wasn't ominous," Kait says, crossing her arms.

"It's....A process."

"Where's Baird?"

Cole huffs, "Making sure Marcus doesn't chop his hand off working on - "

" - The house," Sam finishes for him, glaring, "He's working on the house. Idle hands are the devil's playground, as the saying goes. We're gonna get started on dinner. Come down and help out when you're done getting settled."

As Cole and Sam leave, Kait and Fahz exchange a look. He shrugs, kneeling down to unpack his things.

  
\- o -

  
Kait and Fahz change out of their armor, wearing just the padded clothes underneath. They set their weapons to lean against one wall, pistols strapped to their thighs. They descend to the first floor. The kitchen is expansive, not as big as the one in Baird's estate, but just as impressive. The cabinets and the island were dark mahogany, two wood - burning stoves and ovens was crafted out of wrought iron. _Rustic_, Kait thinks to herself. It reminded her of home.

As soon as the two are noticed, they're put on potato duty. The estate's wiring hasn't been finished yet, so they cook by lantern's light.

"So what're we making?" Kait asks aloud, not directed to anyone, cutting up potatoes Fahz peels and hands to her. He's hunkered down on a stool, peeling potatoes and letting the skins run into a big wooden basin. His sunglasses are off, hanging by his collar.

"Potato and mushroom soup," Carmine responds. It's one of the rare times he's not wearing his helmet.

"Huh," Fahz places another potato to the pile, "JD used to love - " He stops himself. He shifts in his seat, "Ah."

Kait sighs through her nose, chopping away. She dices the potatoes, making the pieces as small as she can. They soften faster that way. She drops the pieces into a large pot of cold water, letting the starch seep out. Sam disappeared at some point, nowhere to be found. Carmine is busy measuring cream, chopping away at green onions and carrots and mushrooms. Cole is across the island, kneading bread, hands covered in flour. Fahz finally finishes peeling quite a hefty amount of potatoes, stranding, stretching out his legs and back.

"Come help me out here, Chutani," Cole asks, waving him over. Fahz seems content enough, having no complaints. There's already two large loafs baking in the first oven, the kitchen filling with the scent of baking bread, warm and homey.

"Del used to love fresh - baked bread," Fahz says, wiping his face, spreading a streak of flour over his forehead.

Kait slows her cutting, "I remember this time," She smiles at the memory, "Me and him went to this market back in New Ephyra. We were looking for this butcher, get some cuts for dinner that night, and when I finally found the place, I'm like 'Del, look, I found it - ' and I turned around, and Del was gone. Disappeared on me. So I'm running around looking for him, can't find him anywhere, asking people if they've seen a guy who looks like him, calling out his name. I find him twenty minutes later, chatting up the baker down the street. Del stopped to help fix the hanging sign above the door."

Fahz laughs, "Was she cute?"

"Sure was, for a little old man in his late eighties. But, he did end up giving us two loafs for free for Del's, and I quote, '_Handsome little heart_.' "

"Yeah? Yeah," Fahz sighs, "Sounds like him alright."

Kait drains the potatoes, carrying the already large bowl to an even larger pot on the stove. She adds the potatoes, helping Carmine stir in the green onions, the carrots, spices.

"You prefer leeks or green onions?" Carmine asks her.

"Green onions," Kait responds, "Leeks are too sweet."

"Way too mild for a hearty soup," Carmine agrees, covering the pot, "It'll be ready in around thirty minutes. Has anyone seen Sam?"

Cole pushes the two loafs he and Fahz were kneading into the oven, "Think she went to the shed out back."

"With Marcus and Baird?"

"Yup," He claps the flour from his hands, "Working on that...." He seems to catch himself, "You know."

Kait leans against the counter, "OK, I've had enough of these sideways stares and mysterious comments. What's Marcus doing back there? And why does everyone seem so darn scared to talk about it?"

Cole and Carmine share a look. Carmine scratches at his beard, big arms crossing.

"Fenix is, uh...Building a coffin."

Kait's eyebrows shoot up into her hairline, "Oh," She says.

"He did it for Anya when she died. Fenix was always good with his hands, always found something to do....I guess it was a way for him to keep busy."

"She was sick for a while," Cole says, "Built it in his free time, when he wasn't taking care of her or JD."

"That..." Fahz waves his hands, "Is fucking morbid."

The other three's heads snap to him.

Fahz physically bristles, shifting uncomfortably where he stands, "Well....I'm not wrong."

"Yeah," Kait pushes from the counter, "But you sure are a dick."

He runs a tongue over his teeth, "Deserved that one, didn't I?"

"Yeah, ya did."

"Fuck you, Diaz," He waves her off.

"Hey hey hey," Cole steps between them, "No need to get our feathers ruffled here."

Kait takes a deep breath, jamming her tongue into the roof of her mouth in an attempt to stop anymore comments from escaping her. Fahz leans against the island.

Carmine sighs, "Chutani, why don't you go try and find Sam? I asked her to get something from the wine cellar, but I'm pretty sure she dipped to go eavesdrop on Fenix and Baird. If she seems busy, go to cellar yourself and bring up a bottle or two," He turns back to the stove, "And we're gonna be here for a few days. It's already stressful enough, and I don't need you kids trying to strangle each other."

"It's not me you have to worry about," Fahz says, already out the back door.

Kait's blood boils, temper skyrocketing. Cole, the mountain of a man he is, tries to step in front of her, but Kait dodges him, running out after him.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" She bites. She grabs Fahz by the back of his shirt, yanking him. He makes a choked sound, then spins around, face twisted in anger, teeth bared in a snarl.

"The fuck was that for?"

"That was a low fucking blow, even for you," She has a hand curled into the front of his shirt.

"What the fuck are you talking about? What did I _do_?"

He's staring at her like she's crazy. She wants to hurt him, _wants_ to, so, _so_ bad. She wants her fist to connect with his jaw and knock all of his teeth out.

There's no sound but the wind and the beating of blood in Kait's ears. She waits for him to make the first move, throw the first punch, hurl the first insult, do something to give her a reason to let it all out.

Time passes. Seconds, minutes, hours, whatever the case, it goes by slow, and with it, Kait's temper. The anger she felt bleeds out into despair, into tears. She purses her lips together, just the slightest of tremors overcoming her. The rage that was twisted in Fahz's face weakens, teeth no longer on display.

"Oh," He says.

_Oh. That's all he has to fucking say. Oh_. She tightens her grip in his shirt, "Fuck you."

He shakes his head, "Oh, flipping Christ, Kait, I didn't - "

She lets go of him, taking a deep breath, realizing she wasn't breathing.

"Kait, you know I didn't mean it like that - "

She paces, shoulders squared, like she's in a boxing ring. She wishes Fahz would put his sunglasses back on. She doesn't like the pitied look he gives her. She tries to move around him, but he steps in her way, all meat and muscle, his palms out.

"I'm sorry," He says quickly, "I'm sorry, Kait, alright? I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking, I shouldn't've said it," He doesn't touch her, doesn't try, but he's closed the distance between them. His voice grows softer, "I'm sorry."

Kait shudders, dabbing her eyes with her sleeve.

"You know nobody blames you for it. Nobody."

She looks down at her hands, clenching her fists. She doesn't want to be at the estate anymore. She doesn't want to see anybody, doesn't want to think, feel, breathe. She just _doesn't_.

She didn't blame herself for it. She didn't kill JD and Del, but it was her mother, her grandmother, her bloodline that caused it. It was generation after generation of pain, all of it leading straight to Kait. It wasn't her fault. That doesn't change the fact that she feels some sort of responsibility for it.

Kait's cheeks burn, "I'm sorry I grabbed you," She feels like she's five again, being forced to admit a wrongdoing to another child.

"Hey," Fahz claps his palms, remnants of flour puffing off, holds them up, "Water under the bridge. I'm not stupid enough to think that we should all be right as rain," A jerks a thumb behind him, "I'm still gonna try and find Sam. Wanna come with?"

Fahz is a jerk. The biggest one this side of the planet. But sometimes, he can reign in all that assholish - ness, and come correct as a responsible and level - headed adult.

Evening wind blows, cooling Kait's temper. She nods without saying anything.

The walk is quiet. Just like what what Kait viewed when they showed up to the estate, the rest of the grounds are wild and unkept. Leaves cover the lawns, curled up and crunching under their boots. The groundskeeper's shed was rebuilt, built exactly the same, so much so that it looked like it had just gotten a new paint job rather than been built from the ground up. There's an orange glow from the windows, smoke coiling out of the chimney.

"Looks like they're home," Fahz says, "Should we knock?"

Kait walks forward. She raises a hand to knock on the door.

".......So how does this look?"

She pauses. That was Marcus. Though muffled by the thick wooden door, it was definitely him. BAD IDEA blinks in big red letters in her head, but curiosity is morbidly strong in her. She leans closer, holding her ear to the door.

"I think he'd like the dark blue," Says Baird.

"Maybe with the yellow, yeah?" Says Sam, "For Anya?"

There's the whirr of a Fabricator. A bluish - white light glows from under the door. Fahz steps closer, leaning against the outside of the shed.

"What're they saying?" He asks.

Kait holds a finger up to her lips, shaking her head. Fahz nods in response.

"It's amazing you even salvaged any of this from the house," Sam says.

"Took a few days," Marcus mutters, "But I kept a lot in here, and our bedroom

There's a series of soft knocks from inside, "Did I tell you I brought those furniture schematics?" Baird says.

"Only about eight times," There's the sound of something heavy being dragged, "Are they in yet?"

"I've got the drive right here."

Fahz leans in further. He slips in the dirt, stumbling, knocking down a rake that was propped up on the side of the house. It scrapes against the siding, crashing in a pile of dead leaves. Kait leaps back from the door.

"_Goddamnit_, Fahz," She hisses out.

"Hey, it was an accident - "

The door flies open. Sam comes out, closing the door behind her. Her face is tight, grinning.

"Kids," She says, irritated, "What are you doing?"

"Uh," Kait clicks her tongue, "Sarge sent us to go find you. Dinner's almost ready."

Sam sighs through her teeth, "And I told him I'd be back when I'd be back, fucking...." She crosses her arms, "I'll be back in a bit. You guys can go back to the house."

"What about Baird 'n Marcus?" Fahz asks.

"If they come, they come, and if they don't, they don't," Sam's tone snaps at the two, "They're busy, and don't need you hounding them for stupid errands and shit, or spying on them."

The two younger Gears fidget in their spots. Anger was not a good look on Sam, and experiencing it from her was completely alien to them.

Sam sighs, puts her hands on her hips, "But I did tell Clay I'd bring back wine. The cellar is around back, near the garden. About the only thing that Jinn didn't destroy around here. Go grab a few, and tell Cole and Clay it's fine if they eat without us."

Before Kait can muster up an apology, Sam opens the door behind her and steps back inside. She slams the door shut.

Kait's head snaps to Fahz, glaring.

"Hey," He points out defensively, _"I_ wasn't the one eavesdropping."

She sighs. He has a point, but her pride won't let her admit it. She jerks her head back towards the estate, "Let's fine that wine before Sarge sends out another search party."

There's a few minutes of searching, easy as pie since Fahz knew exactly where it was.

The estate was no slouch, large and impressive, and the grounds had a few acres under its belt. They stick to the unpainted walls, following the expanse of white. Out of everything around the Stroud estate, the only thing that looked like it had some relative age was the wine cellar doors. Dark, weathered wood with brass handles.

She grabs the handles, pulling. The cellar doors are heavy. Fahz steps around her, grabbing one handle, the two of them hauling the doors open. Dust puffs at the two. The two cough, waving the cloud away.

"How long do you think it's been since anyone's been down there?"

"I don't know. It's been a few years since I've been here."

It's darker now, and if it was dark outside, it was pitch black in. Kait unbuckles a pouch on her leg, taking out a hand - held flashlight. She takes a cautious first step. The wooden stairs squeak and squeal, obviously not used to the weight of people. 

"Looks dark down there," Fahz says with a grimace.

"Want me to hold your hand?"

Fahz lets out a huff, stomping down behind her. The basement is all old wood, beams rickety and dusted with cobwebs. The floors are beige stone. Kait breathes in stale air. The walls are lined with wood casks.

"Yeah, me and the guys spent quite a few nights down here," Fahz says. His voice echoes in the room, "Most of these are probably empty, thanks to us."

"Marcus ever join you?" Kait shines her light around, looking for a bottle rack.

"Nah, I think he was, uh..." He clicks his tongue, "I think he was self aware enough to know he shouldn't be drinking around a buncha kids. Plus, JD was a bit of an idiot when he was drinking, so if you threw a drunk Marcus in there...."

Fahz trails off, but Kait gets his meaning. A rat runs over her foot. Kait hops back with a gasp, bumping right into Fahz. He stumbles into a shelf, and a bottle tumbles onto the stone, shattering. The rat scurries out of sight.

"_Christ_, Diaz, what happened?"

"Jesus Christ, that rat scared the _fuck_ out of me!" She holds a hand to her chest, heart still beating hard.

Fahz laughs, "What, scared'a rats now?"

"I'm not scared of rats, the thing came out of _nowhere_, and it was at least the size of a thrashball," She scans the floor with her light, looking for other vermin, but none appear, "If one crawled over your foot, you'd react the same. Maybe let out a scream a few octanes higher, but - " Her light catches a rack at the far back right of the cellar, "Ah, here we go."

She picks a random bottle from the rack. Brushing dust away, the label is so faded, she can barely read it. She picks out the date XX10.

"Some of these bottles are older than us," Kait says, "Do you think Marcus will care which ones we take?"

"At this point? We could empty the cellar out, and he probably wouldn't blink at it."

The two collect eight bottles altogether. One for each Gear, plus a little extra. When they return back to the kitchen, Cole and Carmine are sitting at the island, and both jump from their seats.

"Hey," Carmine says, "We were wondering where you two disappeared off to."

"Did you find Sam?" Cole asks

Kait and Fahz set the bottles down on the island, "Yeah, we did," Kait says, "And she wasn't happy about it."

"Caught us sneakin' around," Fahz searches the drawers around, "Thinkin' we were spying on the happy couple out there - "

Carmine's arms cross, "And were you spying on them?"

"Well, not on _purpose_," Fahz grimaces, "We were just walking up and we could hear them through the door. Couldn't be helped."

Carmine frowns. He looks at Kait, old eyes narrowed, "That true, Diaz?"

Mentally thanking Fahz for not ratting her out, Kait nods, "We didn't mean to."

Sergeant Carmine gives her a once - over. She's so used to seeing him with his helmet on, she can't help but roll her shoulders uncomfortably while he's staring at her. Unable to find what he's looking for, she guesses, he looks away, turning back to the stove.

"Soup's almost done. You hungry?"

Kait's stomach growls. She'd been snacking on trail mix and water all day, and aches for a real meal. There's no dining table, so she helps Cole set up place settings and chairs at the island. Fahz finds a bottle opener, uncorking one wine bottle.

"Is Sam comin'?" Cole asks.

"She said," Kait makes air quotes, " _'I'd be back when I'd be back.' "_

Cole waves her off in response, "Sam never likes people knowing what she's doing."

Guilt tugs at Kait's gut, "I could bring them some food while it's still hot," And I'll apologize for spying, "They seemed busy with....whatever they were doing."

"Coffin building," Fahz says.

"It didn't sound like coffin building to me," Kait says, "Sounded more like decorating."

"Yeah," Cole nods his head, "That's Damon, alright. He's a stickler for details. Everything has to be perfect."

"Would've driven JD wild," Carmine says, "He hated all the shiny expensive shit Baird would bring over for him."

"That's my nephew," Cole said with a sad smile, "Always worked for what he had."

"Most of the time," Fahz cuts in, "Should've seen the CO's when he showed up on their rosters. Fenix had a fuckin' cult followin' him 'round everywhere."

The three spit stories about Del and JD, and Kait can't help but feel like an outsider. She didn't know the two as a kid, didn't grow up with him, never went to school with him. She didn't have a repertoire of stories and experiences that the others did. When Cole and Carmine talk about Del and JD, she recognized the same type of sadness that she saw in Oscar when he talked about her dad.

Some time passes, the soup finishing on the stove, Carmine attending to it. Sam, nor Marcus or Baird, had shown up yet.

"Well, if Marcus and Baird are working on a funeral, it's gonna be impossible to get them out of that shed," Cole takes the bread out of the oven, "Who wants to bring them dinner?"

"I'll do it," Kait says automatically, standing. Cole brings out a wicker basket, packing away a loaf of bread and three large bowls, covering it with a thick cloth. Kait grabs three bottles of wine.

It's dark outside. She treats the basket and bottles like she's carrying a newborn foal, traversing carefully on the yard. She approaches the door of the shed, knocking softly.

The door opens, and Kait puts on her most polite grin. Baird opens the door. He's out of his armor, wearing a loose white shirt and pants. He's wearing gloves, goggles hanging around his neck.

"Hey," She says, "Thought you guys might be hungry."

Baird attempts to smile, but it comes out as a grimace, "Ah. Yeah," He moves back, holding the door open, "Come on in."

Cool night air opens up to the warm hut. It's sparsely furnished, just old and weathered wooden furniture, salvaged from the ruins of the hut. The fireplace blazes. On the far right, there's a bed pushed up against the wall. Far back was a table that was the entire length of the wall. Marcus had his back to the rest of the cabin, toiling away with something hidden by his frame. From what Kait could see, the workbench was covered in tools, equipment, half - finished projects that she can't make out. Next to the table was a Fabricator. It let out a soft whirr, a half - finished piece in the center chamber, still in the process of being built.

Sam is sitting on a stool in front of the fire. She raises her head, shadows bouncing along her features. She stands, "Nice to see you again," She says.

Kait fidgets in her spot, "I just wanted to come and s - "

"It's mighty fine of you to bring these two dinner, Diaz," Sam says with a wink, "Why don't you keep them company for a bit?"

Before Kait can say anything else, Sam is out the door, shutting it behind her. Baird waves her over to a small alcove carved into the hut, holding a sink. He grabs a sanded wood plank with handles, placing it over the sink, "Over here," He says. Kait barely has time to unpack everything before Baird worms his way into the alcove, and from the lack of space, she steps back and he prepares everything. He shoots a look over his shoulder, "Take a seat, kid," He says.

Awkwardly, Kait takes the stool that Sam was sitting on. It's very short, probably more used as a footrest than a seat, and Kait's knees are almost drawn up to her chest. She sits with her hands in her lap.

"Hey," Baird looks at Marcus, "You don't have any glasses, do you?"

"Don't need 'em," Marcus slides away from the workbench, grabbing one wine bottle. He has a screwdriver in his hand, and jabs it into the bottle cork, drawing it out with a crisp pop. He takes a long drink, then studies the bottle label. He casts a glance at Kait, "Nice choice."

As he uncorks the others, Kait looks at the work bench. In the center was a pile of seemingly random objects. A COG soldier action figure, a thrashball, a faded bundle of what Kait thinks is a shirt, and a freshly - polished set of COG tags.

Baird turns around, "I meant take a seat at the table."

A few feet away was a perfectly good wooden table and a few worn out chairs. Kait stands, moving awkwardly to it. Baird brings her what should've been Sam's bowl, a hunk of bread, and an opened wine bottle. He takes a seat in front of her with his own dinner. Marcus stands by the sink, eating, body slightly facing away.

Kait's stomach rumbles loud as she smells the savory dinner, "Not gonna sit down, Marcus?"

"No," Marcus responds bluntly, taking a long sip of wine.

She looks at Baird, who shakes his head, face tight.

"So," He says to her, "Did you settle in alright?"

"Yeah. The house is nicer to appreciate when you aren't being hunted down," She takes a glance at the Fabricator, "Going to furnish it soon?"

"Hoping to," Baird says, "But with everything going on....well, we'd rather have to build the house again they rebuild it and refurnish it."

"So....what's in the Fabricator now?"

"Casket piece," Marcus says. He drains the rest of his soup, then goes back to the workbench, wine bottle in hand.

A sudden sadness crawls over Kait. Finding her appetite suddenly gone, Kait stands, "I think I should be going, actually - "

"You didn't even eat yet," Baird points out.

"I'm not hungry. Marcus can have it," She strides to the door, waving, "See you in the morning!"

She jogs back to the estate. Sam, Carmine, Cole, and Fahz are just finishing up. Every head in the room raises as she enters.

Sam seems surprised, "Didn't think you'd be back so soon."

"I'm not hungry," Kait says, cheeks flushed, "I think I'm just gonna go to bed."

The group say some other things, but Kait isn't listening. She just carries herself up the stairs, takes her and Fahz's room. It's dark, the only source of light the moon outside. She closes the door, and opens up her duffle bag, rifling around.

JD was getting a burial. He would be remembered as the son of First Minister Stroud and Marcus Fenix, both war heroes, both children of heroes and scientists, continuing on the legacy of outstanding championship and bettering the world for mankind. He would be remembered as a man who's flame could never be extinguished, who thrust himself headfirst into danger to protect the people around him. He'd be honored as a Gear and a war hero for generations to come.

What would Del be remembered for?

He was a loyal friend, loyal to a fucking _fault_. He gave everyone a fair chance, never judged you for your background, your past, only the actions of now. Del was patient, understanding, never tried to force his way into your life or your thoughts, because you took one look at him and wanted him to know how you felt, like it was only fair to him. Would anyone besides the small gathering here remember his intelligence? His kindness? Would anyone remember how he erred on the side of caution? Would they remember that even though he may not trust a circumstance, he trusted you, trusted you more than any man could trust another person? That no matter how fucking hard life got, he was always there, a bright light in a very long, very dark tunnel, helping you to the end? That abandonment just wasn't in his fucking vocabulary?

Where was _his_ memorial? _His_ plaque? _His_ casket to be built by family? Where were _his_ mementos, to be placed in an empty coffin in place of a body? _His_ memories, _his_ photos, toys, family, friends, where the fuck were _they_ for a proper funeral?

Would Del's name be remembered a year from now? Two years? Ten? Would people know him as they know the Fenix family and their legacy? Will he be a page in the history books, or a drop in a bucket?

JD would be buried next to his mother, on a property owned by her, and the sun would shine on his marker and flowers and grass and life would grow from his spot.

Del had his funeral, in an empty vase in a stone crypt, hidden away from the light of day.

It angers Kait. Enrages her. After all the good Del has done, what do the people around him have to show for it? He deserved more than a cold end, than to be a whimper on the wind.

When she first came to New Ephyra, she had the clothes on her back and whatever equipment she could carry. Del was kind enough to lend her spare shirts. They were a size too big, but Kait was never picky, and thanked him for them. When she tried to return them, he told her to keep them.

She took two with her. The rest sat in a pile in Baird's estate. She wishes she brought them.

She finds one. It's a normal, dark grey, COG issued shirt. It had the gear symbol on the left breast, light grey against the dark. She holds it close to her chest. She smells it. There's no trace of him anymore.

She wants to tear everything apart. This was Del's legacy. A weathered set of old shirts and a pair of metal tags. Nobody would ever know his journey with her to Mount Kadar. Nobody would know the good he did in his life. They would remember Del, if at all, as the best friend of JD Fenix, who died by his side fighting the swarm. An accessory to the Fenix legacy. 

She digs more into her duffle. She doesn't have much. Clothes, extra ammo. There's a few extra piercings, hair ties. There's a scarf she uses to cover her mouth so she doesn't suck up dust, and a pair of goggles, and other items that have nothing to do with Del.

He left all his things in his room at Baird's. She wishes she checked his room before they left. Did he have a blue ribbon on his doorknob, too? She didn't even take a look.

She wishes she had a photo of all of them together, her and JD and Del. She wishes she wasn't so stubborn, that she didn't hate having her picture taken, that she was a little more open - minded and joined in on more of the fun when she was invited and she _wishes_ that she was smart enough to save at least one of them instead of going straight for Queen Reyna -

Hot tears roll down her face. She buries her face in the shirt.

There's a soft rapping at the door.

"Fuck off," She says, but it comes out as a rasped whimper.

Silence. Then another knock.

Kait picks up her goggles, "I said fuck _off_," She throws them at the closed door. They clip hollowly off the wood, sliding on the floor. 

"You could just say you wanna sit around and feel sorry for yourself, Diaz," Says Fahz.

Tempers rising, Kait stands and throws open the door, "What part of _fuck off_ do you not understand?"

Fahz stands half a foot away. He's grinning, but it's tight and strained, a battery powered lantern in his hand.

"Kinda rude to dip out of dinner, don't'cha think?"

Kait attempts to slam the door right in his face, but his foot catches the space, making it impossible.

"Wait a second!" He says, "It was a joke, I'm kidding! And this is my room, too!"

Kait thinks of slamming the door again and again until she breaks his foot, but loses steam fast. Defeated, remnants of anger burning into cinders, she turns, walks to the window, staring out. She looks out at the groundskeeper's shed, seeing smoke rise from the chimney. _No wonder he stayed in there all the time. Who wants to sleep in a big empty house every night?_

She watches Fahz through the window reflection. Fahz enters the room, but has enough sense to close the door behind him. He sets the lantern down in the middle of the floor.

"So...What happened in the shed?"

"Nothing," Kait forces out. She really doesn't want to speak to anyone, least of all the most nosiest man this side of the planet.

"Doesn't sound like nothing."

Kait flexes a fist, watching him. He has his hands on his hips. If Kait knows anything about Fahz, he's stubborn as a fucking mule, and he'll stand there all night until he gets an answer.

"He was building a casket," She says, "He had a bunch of JD's stuff, ready to put it all in there when it was ready."

"And it upset you that much?"

"No...Well, yeah, I guess, but...Where's Del's stuff?" She can't bear to turn around, "Where's his proper burial at the family home?" She still has his shirt bunched up in her hand, and brings it up to hold close to her chest.

Fahz's reflection shrugs, "He didn't have any family. Orphaned when he was young, too young to remember any folks, if he had them."

"That's just it, Fahz. No family besides us. Who's gonna miss him like we will?"

"You feel like he's family?"

"After all the shit he's done, damn right he's family," She tries to keep her breathing steady, "And it's not fucking fair that he gets buried alone while we're here. He deserves more than that."

"Kait, this isn't JD's fault - "

"I'm not saying it_ is._ It's not, of _course_ it's not JD's fault, but..." She grits her teeth, squeezing her eyes shut and blinking away tears, "For all the fucking good he did in his life, who's gonna remember him for it?"

Fahz lets out a groan, shifts in place, "We aren't gonna fuckin' _forget_ him. We'll always remember Del, everybody loved him - "

She twists around, "Loved him enough to make front page news? When JD died, every paper around was publishing his name," She gestures to invisible titles in the air, "_Only Son of War Hero Marcus Fenix - Murdered By Swarm,_" She takes a step forward, _"A Bloodline Ends - Son of Beloved First Minister Anya Stroud Perished In Swarm Attack_," Another step, rage building as she remembers the papers, "_James Dominic Fenix - Gear, Son, Hero of the COG,"_ She stops, "Where was Del in those articles, huh? Where was his name? Besides in the mile long obituary column?"

The only sound in the room is Kait's heavy breathing. She didn't realize how close she was to him, chests just a few inches apart. Fahz didn't look pissed, per say, like she expected him to. He looked....

Empty.

Shit, he looked fucking _empty_.

"You aren't the only one fuckin' mad about it, but here's my advice," He sucks in air through his teeth, "Other people don't fuckin' matter. What other people _think,_ don't fuckin' matter. You think anybody else hasn't noticed the buzz? You think nobody else saw the mountain of flowers for JD compared to the pile left for Del?" His voice raises, finger poking into her chest, "Why the fuck do you act like you're the only one who fucking hurts?"

Kait freezes. Guilt crawls in her throat, threatening to choke her. There's a stressed silence, then Fahz pulls his hand back, flexing his fingers, turning it into a fist and holding it against his own chest. 

  
"When we met back in basic training," Fahz says, "Del, JD 'n I were roommates, great friends...fuck, they were my _only_ friends. No matter how fucking harsh I was, they never were mad at me for more than a day, always went back to talkin' to me. No matter what I did, no matter what I said, they always kept me in their lives," There's the slightest of a waver in his voice, "They were the only people who _ever_ fuckin' put up with me. _You_ weren't the only one to lose your best fuckin' friends."

His eyes are glossy, and Kait realizes why he wears those sunglasses all the damn time. His eyes are the most expressive part of him.

"I'm sorry, Fahz," Kait says softly. She's not sure what else to say.

He exhales, shaky. He shakes his head, pinches the bridge of his nose. When he looks back up, he's regained a partial bit of his composure, "Kinda too early to turn in, yeah? There's this spot we used to hang out at behind the house. Feel like a walk?"

**Author's Note:**

> also i think kait is a jerk. shes snippy and rude at times and i rlly think the fahz/kait bromance COULD be real so hopefully more of that bro dynamic between then in gears6 :)


End file.
